Chris Little

Love is patient. Well, that cuts me out of the “love”. Patience is a virtue that is, and has been, difficult for me to perfect. I want to move on already! It does not help that the culture we live in applauds “instant.” We have instant everything – potatoes, popcorn, news, movies, money. You name it and I bet someone has come up with a way to make it instant! (That reminds me. I LOVE coffee! Which probably does not help with my patience. However, instant coffee is NOT as a good as real brewed coffee. It’s not. Yes, I’ve tried Starbucks’ Via(r) coffee. It’s good for instant, it’s not as good as the brewed. Just a side note…to the young man at Starbucks who tried to convince me it was the same. I appreciate your passion – but, you’re wrong.)
Anyway, a way to assist in being patient is to ask yourself, “Do I have a tendency to be a thermometer or a thermostat?” A thermometer reacts to the temperature. It responds to the heat that is generated and gives a reading accordingly. You know your kid has a temp by checking it with a thermometer. Many times in life, our impatience is due to our living life as a thermometer. We react to the “heat” of life – the situations, circumstances, relationships, etc. – that cause us to get stirred up inside. Then, in a split moment, we spew the stuff inside of us on the “lucky ones” who were present when we couldn’t handle the heat anymore. Unfortunately, too many times it is the ones we love the most – family and friends. They get it because they are “safe”. They can handle the “love” we are giving them.
However, to be a thermostat is a better way to “love” those around us. When we sense life “heating up” we choose to change the temperature. We manipulate the climate by cooling off. How do you cool off? I workout. When I go workout, it relieves stress and allows me to work through life and spew my frustrations on the weights or treadmill. I can tell when I’ve missed a day or two because I start becoming more like a thermometer than a thermostat.
In Proverbs 30: 32-33 it says, “If you have played the fool and exalted yourself, or if you have planned evil, clap your hand over your mouth! For as churning the milk produces butter, and as twisting a nose produces blood, so stirring up anger produces strife.” In other words, before you spew on the ones you love…cover your mouth. You can’t get those words back.
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” (Proverbs 15:1,4) This is what it looks like to be a thermostat – to cover your mouth, change the temperature, and then speak words that are life-giving. We all know the phrase “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is a bunch of crock. How do we know that? We know it, because we have been recipients of words from those that love us the most that were not life-giving…and the searing pain they have caused. If only our loved ones had covered their mouth?!?
Love is… being a thermostat more than a thermometer. What’s the temperature at your house?